My birthday

I still have this picture burned into my mind of what birthdays used to be like. Sitting around a table with my mom, stepfather, sister and her family. It was the familial birthday celebration. The one I miss.

This last year has made me take stock in who my family is. My family are my sisters who either sent me cards or called me on my birthday. My family is my aunt - my mom's sister who has taken over the role of making sure I fly right and graduate from school. My family is stepfather who didn't send me a birthday card - but a card which discussed living life - that it is not the destination but the journey - and he signed it "Love, Dad." My family are my friends - the ones who have been through it all and love me despite of my shortcomings. All of these people have come to the forefront. Justine flew up from LA to have a joint celebration and it was wonderful - reminded me of old times - and for a second I almost wished that I could be taking classes with everyone for forever.

I must admit - there was still a moment on how I focused more on how my biological father couldn't be bothered to call me for a few brief moments on my birthday - or that my sister-in-law gave her regards by sending a birthday greeting from my nephew on facebook. I called my brother on his birthday - why couldn't he call me.

But if I was to construct a pros and cons chart - the positives would far outweigh the absence of two no-shows. Well, and I somehow hoped that Germany would say something - but I must have been kidding myself.

I have a clean house, rotations starting soon and a bright future that awaits.

I have three more E-harmony people to come to terms with. I wrote to one and said that I was going to be starting rotations soon and would have very little time left to dating. He replied with "Hilarious. Thanks for the note." I couldn't quite figure out what was funny about my heartfelt message - but at least I learned that he is probably not the one for me anyways.

I am done with dating for now - and it is almost liberating. No more pressure to try and find "the one." Now I can just focus on being a good pharmacist.